And now you are 5....

Our sweet baby boy turned 5. I have been dreading this day... Something about five seems different. Older, more big kid, less little kid.

I relished your days as my baby, enjoyed every moment of having a toddler, felt uneasy when I had you call you a preschooler and now feel like having a panic attack as you turn five and leave that label behind.

Where have five years gone? It seems like such a milestone. One that makes me look back and wonder if I've done the best job I can. You've grown into such a sweet little boy with a warm heart and loving spirit.

In five years we've:
Lived in three houses in two cities
You learned to talk, walk, run and play
You've had two minor surgeries (ear tubes and recircumcision)
You had your first love and break up (with your pacifier)
You had a new sister and welcomed her into our family with open arms
You went to the beach for the first time, to your first UT football game and to Disney World!
You started and finished preschool with flying colors. Your teachers all rave about how smart you are, how gentle and caring and kind you are to the other children. And how you are polite and a joy to teach.
But most of all, in five years, you've taught me more than I can ever teach you. I'm so lucky God gave you to me. Thank you for teaching me about pure love, happiness, forgiveness and for getting to view the world again through your precious, innocent eyes.

I'm thankful that I've been home with you almost everyday of the last five years. I think the thought of you being five might be unbearable if I had not experienced, firsthand, each and every second that has flown by.
As we prepare our family for another new sister I'm so glad to know she will have you to look up to and you to be her helper, her role model and her friend. You're the perfect boy to have two little sisters.
It's my hope that the next five years slow down just a bit more. That I remember more of the fun times and worry less about the laundry or dishes. That I'm more focused on you and your view of the world and less distracted by work or texts or outside influences. I know Ill turn around and you will be 10. But tonight as I write this I'm going to make a huge effort to try really hard...To be present each day ahead. Because I don't want to miss any of it.

So happy birthday my sweet, strong, special boy! You're the greatest gift of all. You made me a mommy! Here's to FIVE and all the exciting things we will accomplish together this year!